Weekend Update - 7/29/16

My message this week? Never underestimate the power of denial, especially mine. As I have been sailing along these past months I was successful at putting a certain something out of my mind. I did this to the point of being somewhat shocked (with the resultant feelings) when said “thing” was once again brought to my attention in the doctors office this week. It’s not that I did not know about this eventuality. I had even discussed this “thing” with my support folks over the past sixteen months or so. However, I had very successfully pulled out my medical degree from the University of Denial and convinced myself that if said “thing” was going to take place, it would take place sometime in the very distant future. The doctor reminded me of the nodules in what remains of my thyroid gland. In short, they have grown and it just might be time to have them removed. My history with cancer, my families history of thyroid issues/cancer and the fact that there was a teeny tiny bit of cancer already in there dictate that it is off to the surgeon I go. I will see him within 2 weeks. Hopefully this will be an “in and out” surgery with no complications or further treatment necessary. However, I was reminded that there might have to be followup radiation. I really do not like talking about this but I also know me well enough to know I need to. Who knows? Maybe I can wait and watch some more. It might be that no followup treatments are needed. I dare to dream……. In the big scale of things this is really part of my new normal and is just another inconvenience. I must admit it did feel good to be able to distance myself from cancer for awhile. It was very refreshing. It is now time for me to show up and follow directions. I can’t wait for bills from this to roll in. I am also reminded that I am in the “donut hole” with my prescriptions. Diabetes is expensive as hell and I cannot play around with the dosages of my medications. I do hope that my story has helped at least one other human being out there to realize you are not alone. Once again … in closing, the reality of my financial situation continues to be what it is…. not good. I am asking all to give what you can and to remember that no amount is to small. Every little bit helps. I am living month to month, and without the support I have received I would not still be living in my home. It is still amazing (and sickening) to me how much all of my medications and treatments are costing. A continuing big “THANK YOU” to all who have shared their experience, strength, hope, time and resources. Your time and gifts are, as always, greatly appreciated and needed. I so look forward to the day when I do not need to ask for assistance. This continues to be a very humbling experience. ***Please note that the 12/3/15 post in my blog is one which I encourage you to share freely.*** Please read and share my story. www.gofundme.com/j55wek